The now infamous Quarantine of 2020 never had an official start date. Unlike Dec. 25, July 4, Feb. 14 and other calendar days synonymous with celebratory events, the world didn’t simultaneously lock its doors on one particular day and fire up Netflix.
Was it March 16? March 27? Did you hold out until early April before realizing that, because your favorite sports team was canceling its season and your beloved restaurant was locking its doors, maybe you should take this Anthony Fauci guy seriously?
For me, the quarantine began the day my wife returned from Costco, presented me with a 45-ounce container of Dunkin Donuts Medium Roast Original Blend coffee and said, “That ought to hold you.”
Her shopping run also contained the items Americans were grabbing as if the doors to a Brink’s truck had just flung open at 65 miles per hour, scattering $100 bills on the interstate. Toilet paper, sanitizing wipes and gargantuan containers of condiments vied for space inside her SUV. Should an asteroid smash into our home anytime soon, what’s left of my body will be coated in salsa.
The label on the Dunkin Donuts java monstrosity stated I should be able to brew 150 cups. As someone who limits his caffeine intake to one cup of coffee per day, and occasionally skips the beverage altogether in favor of tea or water, I calculated that I should be set for five months.
“Where will I be in five months?” I remember asking myself as I opened the container and scooped the first grounds into my office coffee maker. Surely, I’ll be traveling again, spending nights in myriad hotels as I’ve been doing for the last 25 years due to my profession as a corporate comedian and keynote speaker. With so much time away from my home office, it might be upward of a year before I needed to replenish my coffee supply, I estimated.
Yesterday, while preparing my lone cup, the coffee measuring scoop touched plastic. That’s right, I was approaching the bottom. And, as the coffee brewed, I realized how little had changed from the day I opened the container.
There have been no plane trips or hotel stays. The only change to my morning routine was that I replaced the coffee maker’s charcoal filter after about the 60th cup. Five months after the country shut down, give or take a week, our routines have become so singular that we struggle to remember what they were like pre-pandemic.
Many of us can’t remember the last time we packed a suitcase. Bellied up to a bar. Visited a hair salon. Went to our closet and picked out a suit and tie or a cocktail dress. Hell, I can’t remember the last time I wore pants. Chalk that up to an inordinately warm Chicago summer and the fact that Zoom meetings and Skype video chats only require me to look presentable from the shoulders up.
And yet, I now consistently remember tasks that slipped my mind pre-quarantine. Watering flowers for instance. In previous summers, I would sometimes arrive home to dried up geraniums, as I erroneously assumed they could tough it out for 48 or 72 hours. Not so this year. Each day, between the hours of 7 a.m. and 8 a.m. they receive a drenching and have never looked better.
I walk the dog more, change the bed sheets more often and scrub my bathroom sink more frequently. I cook more, exercise more and watch more television.
Were COVID-19 to be eradicated from the earth tomorrow, I wonder how much of my new routine would remain. Would I return to neglecting the dog and the flowers? Or would I figure out some way to merge my pre- and post-pandemic lives?
Like the rest of the world, I am anxiously awaiting that day. In the meantime, I had better replenish my coffee supply.
Being an optimist, I’m going to stay away from Costco.
(Greg Schwem is a corporate stand-up comedian and author of two books: “Text Me If You’re Breathing: Observations, Frustrations and Life Lessons From a Low-Tech Dad” and the recently released “The Road To Success Goes Through the Salad Bar: A Pile of BS From a Corporate Comedian,” available at Amazon.com. Visit Greg on the web at www.gregschwem.com.)
You’ve enjoyed reading, and laughing at, Greg Schwem’s monthly humor columns in Senior Living News. But did you know Greg is also a nationally touring stand-up comedian? And he loves to make audiences laugh about the joys, and frustrations, of growing older. Watch the clip and, if you’d like Greg to perform at your senior center or senior event, contact him through his website at www.gregschwem.com)

Groundbreaking Spiro Exhibition to Debut at The National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum

The Spiro site contained one of the greatest collections of prehistoric American Indian artifacts ever discovered in the United

The Spiro Mounds are one of the United States’ most important ancient Native American sites, as well as an archaeological find unmatched in modern times. Yet, despite creating a sophisticated ancient culture, the Spiro people are nearly forgotten in the pages of history books. How did these incredible works of art and other treasures from all over North America end up hidden for hundreds of years, and why? Opening February 12, 2021 at the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum, “Spiro and the Art of the Mississippian World” will seek to answer these questions and more in the first major presentation on the Spiro Mounds ever undertaken by a museum, representing the first, and possibly last, time these artifacts will be reunited from various collections across the country.
“We are incredibly pleased to announce this unparalleled exhibition, which will give proper honor and representation to the culture and historical impact of the Spiro people,” said Natalie Shirley, The Cowboy president and CEO. “Our staff has worked for years to create a world-class, exciting and collaborative presentation of a people who have been overlooked for too long.”

This exhibition will share the art, history and culture of the Spiro people through approx. 175 objects, as well as an accompanying publication, website, public symposium and panel discussion. It was created in collaboration with representatives from the Caddo and Wichita Nations, the descendants of the Spiroan people, and with contributions by 17 humanities scholars from nearly a dozen universities and museums from across the United States.
The Spiro Mounds were the location of one of the largest and longest episodes of looting at any American archaeological site in history—comparable to that of Mesa Verde in Colorado and, sadly, several others across the country. Both looting and New Deal/Works Progress Administration (WPA) archaeological excavations came together in a near-perfect storm at Spiro. In 1935, the public’s imagination was peaked when the Kansas City Star called the site’s discovery a “King Tut’s Tomb in the Arkansas Valley,” and identified it as the greatest source of Mississippian iconographic material ever found. Embossed copper plates, wooden sculptures, thousands of pearls and beads, large human effigy pipes and engraved shell gorgets and cups are just some of the items found at Spiro. In fact, nearly 90% of all known engraved shell created during the Mississippian period (900 – 1650 AD) was discovered at this one site. This exhibition will include the reunification of a range of items looted and archaeologically excavated at Spiro that have not been together since the early 1930s and 1940s. (story continues below)

“The quality and quantity of material found in at Spiro is unprecedented,” said Eric Singleton, Ph.D., Museum Curator of Ethnology. “We are grateful to have the support of the Spiroan descendants, the Caddo Nation and the Wichita and Affiliated Tribes, as we prepare this exhibition. Without them, this exhibition would not be possible.” The Spiroan people, along with other Mississippian groups across the eastern half of North America, created a world equal to that of the Aztec, Maya or Inca, consisting of trade networks and highly developed social, political and religious centers. The exhibition will explore the archaeology and history of Spiro and its relationship to other contemporaneous Indigenous communities in North and Central America, highlighting community development, religious and ceremonial activities, farming and hunting practices and daily life. It will also illustrate how ecological factors, specifically the occurrence of the “Little Ice Age” beginning in 1350 AD and lasting until 1650 AD may have led to the site’s decline and ultimate abandonment. The exhibition also showcases contemporary Indigenous art pieces that explore the ideas of origin and connect the art and artistry of the Spiro people to their modern descendants.
Following the exhibition, the online component and educational materials will be available on the Museum’s website and in our permanent Native American gallery. In addition, the Museum will give both the Caddo and Wichita Nations all interpretative materials to use at their discretion in their respective tribal museums.
The exhibition will debut at National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum February 12 – May 9, 2021, before traveling to the Birmingham Museum of Art (October 5, 2021 – March 11, 2022) in Birmingham Alabama, and the Dallas Museum of Art (April 15, 2022 – August 5, 2022), in Dallas Texas.
The Spiro and the Art of the Mississippian World has been made possible in part by major grants from the National Endowment for the Humanities and the Henry Luce Foundation, as well as support from the Kirkpatrick Foundation.
Any views, findings, conclusions, or recommendations expressed in this press release do not necessarily represent those of the National Endowment for the Humanities.
About the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum
The National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum in Oklahoma City is America’s premier institution of Western history, art and culture. Founded in 1955, the Museum collects, preserves and exhibits an internationally renowned collection of Western art and artifacts while sponsoring dynamic educational programs to stimulate interest in the enduring legacy of the American West. For more information, visit nationalcowboymuseum.org.

by Greg Schwem

For 30 years I’ve made my living as a standup comedian. I’ve stood on iconic stages including the Grand Ole Opry and the Chicago Theatre. I’ve gazed out at crowds as large as 10,000 and as small as six. We won’t talk about the six.
My moods following my performances have run the gamut from elation to despair. From feeling like I’m the first person to set foot on an uncharted planet to wanting to jump into a recently dug grave and instructing the backhoe operator to “just bury me now.”
The one commonality to all these shows was a live audience. The coronavirus has, for the immediate future, taken away my ability to perform.
Or has it?
Enter the concept of virtual entertainment, an idea that has never really taken off considering that, despite the available technology, most people ultimately think it’s weird to watch a hologram of Prince or another deceased rock star “playing” live on stage. The connection a performer feels to an audience works in reverse too; the audience must feel that same connection.
So when a show I was scheduled to perform for 1,200 members of the dairy industry in Madison, Wisconsin, joined the scrap heap of cancellations on my calendar, I was not hesitant, rather overjoyed, when the organizers said they wanted to me to perform virtually.
Of course, that would mean performing standup comedy to a camera, without a crowd. The audience, I was told, would watch from bedrooms, hotel rooms and home offices, surrounded, most likely, by nobody.
Not exactly the ideal audience for a comedian. Still, the show must go on.
At 8 p.m., I entered a conference room that looked as if preparations were in place for some sort of invasion. A half-eaten takeout pizza sat on a round table big enough to seat 10. Snacks, drinks and sandwiches purchased from an attached hotel represented lunch for the staff tasked with running the virtual operation. Dinner too.
A few IT personnel stared intently at laptops as another virtual presenter, speaking from God only knows where, gave a speech entitled “Practical Proven Systems for More Profitable Innovation.” I heard his voice and saw the PowerPoint slides he had assembled for his talk, but I didn’t see him.
Instead I saw an empty stage and a single camera pointed at it.
“That’s where you’ll be,” the conference organizer told me.
When the previous speaker had concluded, another member of the organizational team grabbed a mic and said, “We have some questions.” These questions, I assume, were submitted by attendees watching virtually. Of the 10 people in the conference room, nobody raised a hand.
The unseen presenter answered several questions and then it was time for me. Like a normal show, a tech clipped a lavalier microphone to my shirt; like a normal show I stood slightly offstage awaiting my introduction. And, like a normal show, I bounded onstage when I heard my name.
The next 45 minutes were left to my imagination.
The conference room participants — seven staff members and three techs — did their best to laugh at my jokes, which, naturally, included a few references to the massive elephant in the room.
“I’m staying in a very nice hotel here in Madison,” I said. “I only live two hours from here, so I don’t really need a hotel. But I was out of toilet paper and the hotel had some.”
Strangely, the longer I performed, the more confident I was that somebody was laughing somewhere. A few laughs from the 10 people in the room were all I needed to keep going. Yes, there were some uncomfortable moments, but it’s also uncomfortable doing standup at a party in the hull of a Catamaran. OK, I brought up the audience of six. Sorry.
I hope there will be no more virtual shows in my career. I hope to be back on stage soon, where I can see and converse with real audience members.
But COVID-19 has taught me one thing: Laughter cannot be quarantined.
(Greg Schwem is a corporate stand-up comedian and author of two books: “Text Me If You’re Breathing: Observations, Frustrations and Life Lessons From a Low-Tech Dad” and the recently released “The Road To Success Goes Through the Salad Bar: A Pile of BS From a Corporate Comedian,” available at Amazon.com. Visit Greg on the web at www.gregschwem.com.)
You’ve enjoyed reading, and laughing at, Greg Schwem’s monthly humor columns in Senior Living News. But did you know Greg is also a nationally touring stand-up comedian? And he loves to make audiences laugh about the joys, and frustrations, of growing older. Watch the clip and, if you’d like Greg to perform at your senior center or senior event, contact him through his website at www.gregschwem.com)

aefuneral.com

Story by Bobby Anderson, RN, Staff Writer

The new year has brought a new round of hospital layoffs as healthcare systems nationwide deal with surging labor costs, shortages, and declining revenues.
Locally, the first two weeks of January saw layoffs from Integris Health as well as OU Health.
Integris announced it was cutting some 200 positions while OU announced an equal number of layoffs.
In a statement, OU health announced the layoffs would coincide with its planned restructuring.
“As part of the redesign, OU Health will move from a holding company to an operating company structure with duplicative services and positions being eliminated,” the statement read. “An estimated 200 positions will be reconfigured to the new structure, which integrates the organization into clinical business.”
Integris Health announced its reduction would be the result of a combination of cuts.
“Financial challenges are multifold, but some include a dramatic rise in expenses due to labor shortages and supply-chain disruptions, and significantly lower patient volumes compared to pre-pandemic days,” the statement read.
Integris laid off 140 positions and cut 60 vacant jobs, according to a spokeswoman.
The healthcare industry has suffered from nursing shortages and the winter’s omicron surge, forcing many organizations to turn to contract workers demanding higher rates.
The loss of Covid subsidies from the federal government also impacted the ability to keep up with rising labor costs.
Many systems find themselves in a counter-intuitive role of both cutting positions while trying to recruit and retain nurses.
OU Health announced its organizational redesign to complete the integration from its historic merger on July 1, 2021.
OU Health was created as the flagship comprehensive, integrated academic health system to improve the care and outcomes for all Oklahomans. As the state’s academic referral health system, OU Health plays the unique role of providing critical specialty services with access to advanced technology and expertise.
“OU Health needs to support and enhance the capabilities of the state’s vital rural and regional hospitals as the flagship academic referral center. All care that can remain in a community should remain local, but if the patient needs a higher level of care, OU Health is here to serve,” said OU Health President and CEO Richard Lofgren, M.D., MPH.
The organizational redesign and operational restructure will enable OU Health to improve efficiencies and grow its impact in the state and region as well as create a highly integrated, modern clinical platform, one that serves even more Oklahomans.
“In order to grow and adapt to industry changes, we need to perform in terms of the quality of our services, patient experience, and the efficiency and effectiveness of our processes,” Lofgren said. “Oklahoma needs the unique specialty and sub-specialty services we provide. We are positioned with dedicated physicians and staff to fully realize our special mission of clinical care, education, and research. We are committed to our role of continuing to improve the care and outcomes for the region and beyond.”
Both health systems are still actively hiring bedside nurses offering both recruitment and retention bonuses.

More than 100 Oklahoma Medical Research Foundation donors now have a better understanding of the scientific discoveries their gifts make possible.
This week’s annual gathering of OMRF’s Loyal Donors Society included tours of the foundation’s Multiple Sclerosis Center of Excellence and demonstrations of current research projects ranging from Alzheimer’s to cell regeneration to blood clotting.
OMRF’s loyal donors are those who’ve contributed for at least five straight years. Using that criteria, the foundation currently has 989 loyal donors, including 111 who met the five-year threshold for the first time this past year.
Combined, they have given nearly $80 million. The longest active streak belongs to the Oklahoma Association of Mothers Clubs, whose contributions date to 1956 – a decade after OMRF’s founding.
“Thanks to your generosity, our scientists make a worldwide impact on human health,” Vice President of Research Courtney Griffin, Ph.D., told the group. “We take great pride in being Oklahoma’s medical research foundation,”
Tuesday’s event was the first visit to OMRF for Peggy and Richard Geib, who’ve been giving to OMRF since 2019. “I can tell that everyone here is passionate about what they do,” said Peggy Geib, “and that they feel like they’re making a difference.”
The Geibs make an annual year-end contribution to the foundation, and they also make memorial gifts to OMRF following the death of a friend or relative. “Flowers are fine, but to us, the memorials are more meaningful,” Richard Geib said.
Sylvia Zimmerman, a donor since 2005, described the event as “an eye opener. I love that OMRF focuses not only the cause of illness, but also on the treatment of it.”
Robert Tilghman enjoyed learning about cardiovascular health and OMRF’s cardiovascular biology research at the event. “I love the dedication of the scientists here and the constant effort to explore every avenue to solve a problem,” said Tilghman, who’s donated to OMRF for 12 straight years.
The consistent generosity of donors like those who attended Tuesday’s event has fueled OMRF’s research since its founding in 1946, said Vice President of Philanthropy & Community Relations Penny Voss.
“These donors are essential to our mission, which aims to help people lead longer, healthier lives,” Voss said. “If we can show our appreciation while giving them a better understanding of the research they make possible, this event is a success.”